Not everything I do is defined or connected to or because of amm. But I do try to look for those things in what I choose to do, just as a way to still feel her.

The season of the fair, or exhibition, is upon us. But I don’t have memories of being at the exhibition with amm. When we were young, we always went to Buffalo Days in Regina, but it was with Baba. Baba and Papa lived near the exhibition grounds, and Baba, Lise, Anth and I would pack up for the day and walk to the grounds for a long, and exhausting, day at the fair. Baba loved it. And I am sure that amm loved that Baba took us all and she didn’t have to go. I have many memories of Buffalo Days with Baba, Lise and Anth. Some good (eating a picnic lunch in the gardens listening to live music or spending hours under that sweltering bingo tent), some not so good (puking after being scared silly on the Gravitron).

But no real memories of the exhibition in Saskatoon, or once we moved to North Battleford with amm. Maybe it was because we always saved ourselves for Buffalo Days, and then once I was older and could go with my friends to the local fair, I didn’t want amm to come along…she was only required to be my driver.

So this year, as I gear up to head to the Stampede next weekend (which really just consists of going on an all day pub crawl on the final Saturday…ok…and maybe to the grounds on the Friday night), I look for ways to connect this to amm. And here are my connections:

  • amm liked to drink beer. I will be drinking beer.
  • amm was born in Calgary. The pub crawl is in Calgary.
  • amm was dedicated to 4H when she was younger. Mind you it wasn’t cows and horses and instead sewing and homemaking, but 4H can = Stampede. No?
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